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Family and children
The family is a place for pleasure and sufficing, where each
person can find love, understanding and support, even if the life is not so
successful. In family it is possible to have a rest and to store up fresh energy
to feel yourself more sure. We long for harmony in a family circle, when we can
naturally get free, feel fairness, love and the peculiar vitality, but find it
seldom. How it can be - everyone strive for harmony, but often have an opposite
result? Everything depends on whom we live with. The relationships depend on
socionic personality types of people.
The good relations in family is a problem of survival,
problem of prime vital importance. If people in families will have human
relationships, we shall provide more secure and human world around us. And these
relationships between the close people can be provided, knowing their socionic
personality types.
It is better to define a socionic personality type of the
person when they are still a child. The parents who are complementary to one
another, can be sure what socionic personality ype of their child will be even
before his(her) birth, as the child will also be complementary to them. The girl
will have a personality type of her mother, the boy will have the type of his
father. Thus, in dual families heterosexual children mentally supplement one
another, and unisex are identical, therefore, in such circle there is an easy
perception of information on the one hand, and the saturation of information on
the other, that helps the parents to retain fruitful intercoupling with
children. There are the best, the most harmonic families. The identical
relations between the members of one sex in such family are also necessary for
forming steady mentality of children: nobody can become the best teacher, than
person of an identical type and the best tutor, than a dual. By the way, the
people from dual families differ by mild, optimistic nature and balance
mentality.
In dual family the child grows and receives from the parents
full harmony for progressing, developes, and becomes the bright personality. A
role of the parents is in helping to preserve and to route their child, as far
as they are capable to do it. Moreover, they will find it very easy and natural.
The child in dual family feels as a full and equal member,
who is highly appreciated, feels itself necessary in a surrounding of the
people, who wait from him respect, whose opinion is taken into consideration.
The child can act and speak openly about pleasure and pain, can tell frankly
about defections, without a fear of being punished or mocked at, on the
contrary, such a child will always be listened, will be understood and will have
a help, because errors show that the child grows and developes. It is easy for
him(her) to have a joyful attitude to life, to laugh and to joke, to be glad to
each day.
The child which was born in a dual family has many
advantages: he/she grows calm, confident, less impressionable, develops faster.
In further life searches and arranges around of itself the complementing people,
such as his(her) parents. Reaches success, marries with a dual, that in turn
promotes the best realization of his(her) capacities.
In the age of maturity the girl searches for the partner with
qualities, similar her father, the boy - on the contrary. Thus the positive
stereotype of a harmony relationships comes from one generation to another.
Children, whose parents are duals, more often marry dual. It
is more difficult to find a dual for those, who grows in not dual families. They
have no experience of feeling of duality, bear a stereotype of family relations
from mother family in their own families.
In undual families the child suffers, feels deprived, for the
complex of inferiority is developed. Children require not so much supply of
materials, but attention, involvement, understanding, sincere warm relations,
they need to satisfy their spiritual necessities. Of course, adults will
disagree with it. Ask for this your child...
Therefore, in order to not break a harmony of life it is
better to make a family with the mentally- complementing person.
In families where there is no mental compatibility, and
therefor unfavorable relationships dominate, the parents also influence
progressing of the child, he(she) grows estranged, frustrated, more
impressionable and predisposed to a seclusion, with the undervalued self-rating,
does not use completely possibilities, loses individuality, and as the
personality exhibits itself poorly, reaches success with large efforts, or does
not reach it altogether, frequently being unlucky wretch. No wonder, that yet
from childhood children are estranged in families, do not feel the significance,
suffer, feel lone, and as a result, become indifferent to all family events, to
parents. Such stereotype of relations can be transferred hereinafter to their
own future families. In the age of maturity children, wanting to make a healthy
family with warm and quiet relations unconsciously and do not wishing that, also
search for the partners with characteristic qualities similar to their parents
and fall in uncomfortable relations, where the chaos dominates. And the person,
who was educated in psychological uncomfortable conditions, falls in the same
relations, as well as his(her) parents, where the people not only do not hear,
but also do not want to listen to each other: it is very difficult to understand
for each of them what does other want from him(her).
The partners, do not wishing that, permanently touch
vulnerable, weak places, which they have to protect permanently during the life
and which there is very easily to touch in a unfavorable psychological
situation. They try their best to make a normal microclimate in the family, but
can not reach it, on the contrary, even degrade a situation. They are nervous,
tear the health and lose time in vain. Science proves that relationship is a
regularity, therefore, neither in human, nor in superhuman forces it is
impossible to change them. And, instead of enjoying life, such people shatter
all possibilities of it.
Aushra Augustinavichute noticed, and it is affirmed by
practice, that there are cases, when, falling in mentally complementing
relationships, people can nevertheless divorced because of a negative stereotype
of communion, frustrations and inadequate perception of a world, people and
their relationships, acts, behavior, that arises from a complex of the last
insults and psychological disharmony in unfavourable mother or previous family.
If only people could realize all danger and those
consequences, which arise at creation of not dual family, when the unity is
broken and the harmony not only in family but also in society is disturbed,
there is estrangement between the parents and children. Children suffer from
ignorance of their parents. Such attitude to children arises because of burden
of problems in not dual families. The parents can not clear up relationships
between themselves in any way, the presence of children foils, galls, gets on
their nerves, so parents keep away from their children or see in them a reason
of their troubles and accuse them in it. Children suffer also together with
their parents.
The stereotype of relationships is transmitted further from
generation to generation
The stereotype is not critical, public opinion, thoughtlessly
accepted by the person, and turned by him(her) into personal life norm, as
result of “life wisdom”.
In dual families there is an atmosphere of mutual respect and
love, a high self-rating, immediate, straight, legible and honest, frank
communications, human rules oriented on notice to other, the social links are
opened and positive. It is very interest and pleasant to be the member of such
family. Even strangers, being in a circle of dual family feel wonderful
spiritual comfort and cosiness.
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